Bought onions instead of potatoes? Forgot to make a pudding? Dropped the pavlova (better than admitting it flopped)? We asked our favourite chefs to give us advice on those last minute, unfortunately inevitable catastrophes that arrive each year as reliably as Santa eats the cookies you left him. Matt Preston, Mitch Orr, delicious. senior food editor Phoebe Wood and food editor Warren Mendes say it’s ok, Christmas isn’t cancelled quite yet.
Matt Preston says: “Toss them with butter and loads of fresh mint from the garden, or finely dIce the a couple of sticks of celery and the pale leaves. Toss these in with the cooked peas and a a couple of spoons of gravy to coat it all. No celery? Use lettuce instead and let the heat of the pan wilt it slightly.”
Matt Preston says: “Grill wedges of cos lettuce charring it a little and dress with something rich and a little sour or just tell people that you read on delicious.com.au that “Burnt cabbage is so hot right now” and serve the bits that aren’t charcoal. If you want to be really trendy purée the better prices with salt, lemon and some turkey fat to make a sauce. If it tastes too burnt ditch it!”
Matt Preston says: “Good onya, Brussels are as much an essential part of Christmas as the cranberry sauce. Cooking these little cabbages is easy as trimming the stem. Next peel off the tough outer leaves. Cut a cross with a knife in the base of each stem. Drop in boiling salted water, cook at a gentle simmer until bright green and still a little nutty. You could cook them a little less and finish in a hot oven with bacon batons. Let them brown at little at the edges.”
Chef Mitch Orr says: “Yo, this really isn’t a problem, burnt things are good, as long as it hasn’t turned to charcoal you can still use it. Make a dressing of lime juice, garlic, sugar, fish sauce and sesame oil and be generous with it. Or make a green tea and seaweed butter, roast some green tea leaves, wakame and nori, blitz them into a powder, add some konbu if you have it. Brown a shit load of butter in a heavy-based pan, add some lemon juice and salt and the tea and seaweed powder. Drenched the burnt cabbage in the butter and serve.”
Phoebe Wood says: “Surely you have a block on haloumi in the fridge. Brush it with olive oil or the glaze from your ham and roast it in a hot oven. It will turn golden and crisp and guests don’t need to suffer through eating only greens for lunch. Alternatively, you could just roast up those carrots you left out for Santa’s reindeer and match them with spicy chickpeas and nuts.”
Chef Mitch Orr from ACME says: “First of all, LOL. Good on you. Let’s be honest though, this is an easy fix. Onions go with everything. Slice them up finely and caramelise them nice and slowly, spike them with a little sherry vinegar and serve them on the side of your ham, or put them with the sausages you’re burning on the bbq. Alternatively top and tail them, leave the skin on and cut them in half, douse them in extra virgin olive oil, butter and salt and slowly roast them until they’re soft and sweet, again drizzle them with some sherry vinegar and serve them as they are!”
Matt Preston says: “No worries – make ice cream Christmas pudding instead. Line a pudding bowl with over-hanging plastic wrap. Soak whatever dried fruit or glacé cherries you have in the pantry with warmed brandy, tea or sweet sherry. Chop it up first and toss with spices like cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice or mixed spice. Chop up any almonds, walnuts, hazelnuts, pecans of pistachios you might have. Stir the plumped spiced dry fruit and nuts into soften ice cream. Scoop in the lined pudding bowl and refreeze. Garnish with red currants (or glacé cherries) and fake holly. The ratio should be 550 grams of fruit and nuts to 1litre of ice cream.”
Mitch Orr says: “I grew up eating frozen peas, they’re actually a good product. Kill two birds with one stone. Reduce the shit cider by half, add a whole heap of butter, emulsify the two into a nice shiny thick sauce, season it with some soy sauce. Saute a couple of eshallots and a couple of anchovies, add the peas and cook until they’re just done, serve them swimming in the cider butter.”
Warren Mendes says: “Don’t panic, you have enough ingredients! Use what you have in the fridge. Mustard and jam make for a simple glaze. 2 tsp mustard to every ½ cup of jam (something like apricot jam will work best). You can spike this further, depending on what you have in the cupboards too – garlic, dried chilli, extra virgin olive oil.”
Matt Preston says: “Poach chorizo in it, freeze it to scrape into a “granite Normande” on a hot day, use it to pot roast chicken in finish with Dijon, cream and butter browned apples. Or send it over to my house you Philistine and we’ll drink it with crispy pork scratchings and the cricket on.”
Warren Mendes says: “Did you drop it? Or did it just collapse? Don’t cry, its not over. Turn it into eton mess! Bust out your sexiest glassware and nobody will know your pav didn’t work. Create some mini eton mess trifles with all your other fruits, nuts and toppings for the pav. Or, cover it with enough fruit and cream that nobody will know better.”
