Debate is swirling online and social media on whether it’s ever okay to take someone’s assigned seat on a plane without asking for permission first. 

Here’s the scenario that was uploaded to Reddit: a 22-year old woman was on a flight and noticed a man in his 40s sitting in her seat next to his wife and daughter. She kindly asked him to move as she had specifically booked and paid more for that seat. He refused to move, got mad and said he was sitting next to his family and the airline had messed up his seating. The flight attendant came over and forced him to move, but the woman felt bad as the daughter looked sad that her father wasn’t sitting next to her, even though she was still seated next to her mother. 

Let’s address the first issue. Taking someone’s seat on a plane without first asking them to switch is never okay. We live in a world where airlines have monetised seat selection. Whether you think that to be fair or not, passengers who care deeply about where they sit – for personal reasons or otherwise – pay good money to sit where they like. 

You’re also able to select your seat, if you so wish. There are seats available free of charge that you can choose. If the flight is already full, that does leave you with fewer options, but you can always keep checking back before flying to see if a better seat has become available. If you’re not prepared enough to give yourself the best chance to get a seat that you prefer, that should not be the burden of another passenger. 

Related story: Here’s what your seat selection on a plane says about you, according to our travel editor 

Now onto the other issue: travelling with kids. As a parent, I know the perils of flying with a child. At times, it can defeat you. My partner and I do everything possible to pre-plan and make it as comfortable as possible for our child. 

Usually that means noise cancelling headphones, lots of busy books, snacks, activities and always ensuring one parent is seated next to them. Some short-haul flights only have a 2-2 seating configuration, so our kid’s favourite parent of the day sits next to them while the other sits on the aisle seat of the row adjacent to help out. If there was a seating configuration of 2-3-2 we would pay for three seats next to each other, if they weren’t automatically assigned. 

We’d also double-check when checking in whether our seat selection was maintained, so we could prepare ourselves accordingly. We would never assume it was okay to inconvenience another passenger. And if we did feel like the seating may be an issue, we’d speak to the passenger or flight attendant directly first before thinking it was okay to swap seats. 

So, if you care about where you sit on the plane, it’s simple: pay up or plan ahead. 

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