We love a great cafe, but even we have to admit that some cafes have taken the hipster trend a little too far. You know the ones – where there’s a whole separate menu just for coffee, kale features in at least four menu items, and the whole place doubles as an art collective/design studio/florist. It’s so hip, it hurts.

So when you’re out brunching or lunching this weekend, take this handy Hipster Cafe Bingo guide with you, and tick off every hallmark of hipsterism you see! Ten bonus points to anyone who orders their matcha latte with camel milk.

Hipster Cafe Bingo

The rules: Be alert. Be aware. While you’re enjoying your single origin cold-drip, look around you and see how many hipster cafe signs from this list you can see. Tick off as many as possible – this is a numbers game, people!

1. The bacon comes out as one big slab instead of crispy rashers, as God intended.

2. The eggs are described as “hen’s eggs.” As opposed to…?

3. The green juice costs more than you’ve spent on coffee all week, but the wait staff are hyper-enthusiastic about how amazing it’ll make you feel.

4. Bone broth is on the menu. Also goes by the name “brodo.”

5. The barista knows the provenance of every coffee bean, and proceeds to explain it all to you, at length.

6. Beards. Lots of them.

7. There’s a hashtag.

8. At least seven types of bread on the menu.

9. But not just, like, plain white.

10. They make their own butter. And jam. And almond milk.

11. The pancakes are made with an artisanal flour alternative, like teff or buckwheat. Gluten is for Normals.

12. They flat-out refuse to serve skim milk.

13. There’s no outward-facing signage, website, Facebook, phone number or contact details, but somehow there is always a queue.

14. The chairs are all mismatched and you end up hunched over on a tiny stool, leaning across to talk to your friend, who, meanwhile, is sinking into the deep couch.

15. A pile of the latest hybrid pastries (cronuts, zonuts, cruffins etc) greets you as you walk in.

16. The milkshakes are $12, but they’re made with homemade syrups, so…

17. You have no idea who’s a waiter and who’s not, because everyone looks exactly the same. You just want to pay the bill!

18. You’re not ordering corn fritters. You’re ordering “corn, jamon, creme fraiche, polenta dust, smoked coriander.”

19. Two words: salted caramel.

20. There’s a waitress who looks like Natalie Portman with tattoos, who smiles when she takes your order… then disappears, never to be seen again, like the manic pixie dream girl she is.